Alright, back to kink So I am wondering what everyone's thoughts are on electronic domination. I am referring to two people who may not live close so the commands come via text, email, webcam, and the like. I have a fuck buddy who does not live close (all my fuck buddies are Dom's) so we do this often and it can be quite fun especially when he tells me to "prove it" and I have to figure out how to show him that I am doing as told. However, sometimes I feel like it is just a game, there is no real submission behind it. Indeed, in this case, I am acting the bottom. Beyond fun, does anyone find this fulfilling at all or what are you thoughts on it?

Personally? No way. I want skin on skin. Of course, you know I don't have a problem doing it as a Dominant for pay ;)

yes, skin on skin is best of course. With this guy there is skin on skin when we can get together(and it is fucking amazing). The electronic thing is just leaving me kinda hollow. Hell hun, if I could get paid I might even try and Top on the phone. I admire what you do.

Thank you, Sweet I hadn't realized you were doing both. I totally feel that there's no need for me to engage in a cyber only relationship but I can see how a real life relationship could use the cyber stuff as part of fun. By the way, there's totally room out there for another Top if you want to earn a little extra cash ;)

Is there really room for another Top? I mean, I have only Topped once and it was weird but I do love money. Is there training? I would love to hear about what you actually do.

LOL the love of money can help a person get motivated to learn a new skill! If you want you can just sign up for www.niteflirt.com and look around at the various 80796 and browse the various categories. See what other women are doing and maybe try to create a profile page of your own and leave your lines open to take s geared toward whatever category that resignates with you. Just think about the many, many things that submissive males post around here and how you could gear your conversations towards a man like them. There's also a website ed www.dommesandsubs.com which is free for Dommes to sign up for. They have forums and subs can search out Dommes based on what it is they seek then move to your niteflirt account for the , to tribute you money just because your awesome, buy you gifts through websites that don't let them have any information about you but let them know what you want and take they're money ;0!

Thank you so much! You are truly a sister in kink and crime ;).

You know it, Sistah!

of course I prefer skin on skin but i think this could be very fun and kinky. Honestly i think it takes more of a creative mind to be able to do something like this and enjoy it.

Agreed!

skin on skin for me too But I do like a webcam session or phone session every now and then. I am a vouyer and an exhibitionist

Exhibitionism Funny. I modeled for the figure drawing classes in college. I never felt like that was erotic. (mostly cold and crampy from holding an uncomfortable pose and staying still) Until one time I had moved to a new city, was bored, and thought I'd see if the local U needed a model. It was a male prof, and he said he did need a model. I showed up for the class a week or so later, and it was just the instructor and one female student. No big deal until the prof walked out, at which point I was alone and naked in front of a woman. The only other times that had happened in my past, (post childhood anyway) had been right before sex. In about the time it took to type that last sentence, the thought had occurred to me and I started getting an erection. I think tried thinking about dead kittens, rotten food, cow manure, you name it, but nothing seemed to keep the erection from happening. After what seemed like eternity, I finally got control back and it went flaccid. Right after that, the prof came back in. After it was over and I was dressed, the prof asked if I wanted to see the work. I just remember his sketches seemed very complete considering the x to x minute poses. We looked at the art of his student, (who had disappeared as soon as the prof told me I could dress) and I said I guess she didn't like drawing guys. The prof asked why I said that. "All her drawings are above-the-waist."

Of course there is real submission behind it if you choose to really submit. But it's the same in person too, isn't it? You could physiy go through the motions while your mind & heart were elsewhere. How deep the experience is depends on how deeply you choose to go. I don't think it's for everyone. But I know people who've enjoyed it hugely. If it works for you, I'd say revel in it, and don't worry about trying to justify it to others. Your feelings are real. And even an in-flesh experience very quickly becomes a memory. Plus... what a great way to challenge your creativity.

Then at least you know what your challenge is Can he give you the TLC verbally? Perhaps in a follow-up email or something? Do you have a photo you could look at? Would it help to write about your thoughts/feelings in a journal, either one you share with him or one you keep to yourself? Do you have a girlfriend you can go over all the squishy details with? I'm just throwing suggestions out there, I can't say what might work for you. I had a distance relationship where we didn't see each other for over a year, and that was before email and skype and cheap phone s and all that too. And yes, the relationship lasted. And it's not always a choice: It doesn't have to be either "in person" or "online." Why not both? They're different. The more experiences you have, well, the more you have.

Thank you for the well thought out answer. Thinking of ways to get that TLC in makes me feel a whole lot better. I will talk to him and see if it is something we can work on. Thank you again!

And it might take some experimentation You can't know till you try. If you like, I could email you a rather longer essay on this subject.

Indeed, I would like that very much.

OK, give me a few. Minutes, I mean.